Best Friends

You have been through a break up with a partner of some standing and the question that arises is how much time should there be between this traumatic event and dating again? As break up\’s can be soul destroying, there are people who believe that the soul is enhanced by the frailty of love and regard this a journey of magnitude with positive growth. These are beautiful words and meaning but to the victim of an unexpected break up there is probably not a lot of consideration at this point for the message of hope that always remains.

In the heart of a break up the world seems unyielding as the days seem like lifetimes and the weeks bring no change. What seemed so fantastic has delivered its verdict and you cry to the heavens \”what will happen to me and how can I live without him?. There is no fault on land or in any other realm as love is not perfect or neither the perfect plan but it has a way of healing us so we can begin again to open ourselves to a brand new play.

To die for love was considered a noble thing in days gone by and many a man or woman took their lives in the name of love. Writers through history have told stories of kingdoms where true knights prevailed in a chapter of swordfights, love and betrayal.. Did the knight love again without anger or pain did he carry his passion to the depths of his grave? Is it any wonder we hunger for a perfect romance where flowers fill the meadows and birds sing out loud. Happy ever after we have listened to for so long, from the pages of the ancients to the present day songs \”Love Hurts\” Are we really prepared for the multitude of feelings a break up can bring, Will love really conquer all?

\”Don\’t carry your burden to the next waking day\” Break ups are a gateway to personal growth but too many carry a negativity that cannot be released till the poison has been squeezed out. If you carry that potion to you next potential date you will bring with you all that was wrong and unresolved from a significant relationship before. It is like signing the death warrant on a possibility as you have pre written the outcome and blanketed your hope. Baggage is the term Counsellors and professionals refer to when you cannot release emotions like anger and jealousy, leaving you scarred and alone with your confidence in tatters.

Sally has entered the caf on the way to the date but self-doubt and anger are blinding her way. Why has she come here when she feels no desire? The break up with Mike was all that she feared, what seemed so remarkable ended in tears. Sally was destroying the chance to be happy again for the guy she was meeting could be all that she dreamed. Instead she was anxious and convinced that he would hurt her before it could even begin. Sally needed to put a line in the sand between Mike and the new guy knowing that life has a way of healing all wounds and romance can blossom when you begin to smile again.

It’s coming down to the wire, and your big day is almost upon you. You close your eyes and try to relax. You even t take a few deep breaths prior to opening your eyes. You are trying to envision your perfect wedding. You close your eyes again and this time you are lost in deep thought.

What would be the first thing that you would want to see? Would it be flowers, balloons, or even candles lining the walkways and walls? Would you want papier-mch crafts, or would you rather skip napkin holders and centerpieces? You have seen thousands of wedding favors in magazines, but you want something special, something that seems as though it were made just for you. What you are looking for is unique wedding favors. Ah yes, those would make your day perfect. The only question is what exactly do you want them to be?

There are literally endless possibilities as to what you could have customized about your wedding as well as wedding favors. Some people go all out of their way and order ice sculptures, or have miniature porcelain figurines of themselves made to give to their guests. Everyone differs from one another greatly, and so their wedding favors do as well. Sometimes the couple’s getting married are really into sports, so they may chose them as the theme for their favors and decorations.

It is quite fascinating really. Watching a couple pick and choose what they want at their reception. They always go through even the smallest of details with a fine toothed comb to ensure that it will be exactly how they want it. Sometimes they even decide to change things at the last possible minute. They have the right to change whatever it is that they want though because after all, it is their wedding. Could you imagine if it were your wedding you had to plan for. What type of wedding favors would you choose?

If I had to choose my wedding favors, they would defiantly be like none other ever seen before. I would want them to be as custom and as unique as possible; and yet have them, still hold the same original quality as any other wedding favors around on the market. It would indeed be quite the challenge, but then again; isn’t all of the planning which goes into a wedding supposed to be a challenge? Of course it is, because no two weddings are the same. Just like no two people on this Earth is the same. Sure I mean, you may find details which bear resemblance to one another, but guaranteed; they are different.

The trick to finding shops which can deliver completely unique wedding favors is all in the research. Know what it is that you want, or what designs you may want. If you do not like an element of them, don’t be afraid to ask the shop owner if they can change what it is you don’t like about the product. Overall and most important on your list, know your budget! Never order something that you know will require you to sink your entire wedding budget into. You do not have to go all out, sometimes simple is better. Always remember, if it absolutely must be unique or custom, at least make sure that it embodies some representation of the happy couple and not just one party to it. These are key elements to surviving the planning part of a wedding. Good luck!

Salt or pepper, catchup or mustard, bread or toast, the basketball game court-side or a booth at the opera, guess what, you can stop making these small bothersome decisions. You do not have to worry about them anymore. No, you are not dead; you are getting married. It is the reason you were born. If you think about it, it is a pretty good deal, actually. I mean, women enjoy making decisions for other people. That is why they are so darn good in the workforce and why there should be a woman president.

If a man were in charge of a wedding, we would have some pretty plain and ordinary ceremonies with very little style and zero class. We would have roses, a woman would have roses, and about two dozen other flower varieties that make roses look good. We would have wedding favors; they would languish for years in someone’s attic, closet, or cedar chest. A woman would have unique wedding favors that people would cherish and put on display in their homes.

Men can plan weddings and can come up with beautiful ideas that would enhance the wedding and make it special, but only by thinking like a woman. After the wedding, we would be heading for sports camp or a fishing resort to spend our honeymoons. By listening to women, we instead have a wonderful time lying on a beach being catered to by a staff that wants nothing but our happiness. I would not have thought of it but hey, I will take the beach any day of the week.

From the moment the doctor said, “It’s a boy!” A woman started making decisions for you. Does it sound like a bad thing? Well, you would be wrong to think so. If it were not for that woman taking charge at that precise moment, you would have lain there butt naked, shivering in the cold, crying your heart out. (Just like the last time a girlfriend left me.) Women do everything well but what they excel at is making decisions. I am not necessarily referring to major, planetary stuff, although if they were in charge, there would be peace and the planet would be in great shape. I am talking about everyday stuff, weddings included.

Not for the catch and see if this sounds familiar to you because it is a design that was set up by a clever woman centuries ago and, with the patience born of womanhood, has proven throughout the years to be a huge success. From the day that you were born, you were “groomed” to be a loyal and obedient husband. Every decision in your life was made by a woman. She loved you and cared for you and told you what to eat, (and when to eat it) what to wear, (and how to wear it) and what to say (do I need to say it?)

Then came the day that we grasped at our independence and we took control of our own lives rebelliously. When mother lay our clothes out we left them there on the bed. We chose our own set of clothes from the closet and we left for school leaving her standing at the doorway with a defeated look on her face at least, until we were out of site. Then she smiled at our foolishness. After all, the closet is full of clothes that she picked out, not the man-child.

For the next twenty or so years, we believed we were making the decisions that forged our independence, never realizing that we were being cleverly manipulated into becoming the kind of husband she and your new wife’s mother decided you would be years before you were born. Now, when you walk into a room and your mother, your mother-in-law, and your wife stop talking and smile at you, you jokingly ask if they were talking about you. They will all look at each other and laugh because they were talking about you. They were talking about how well you turned out and they were also discussing how to “groom” your son. Congratulations, you are about to be a dad.

When a man gets married, it is obligatory that his friends play a couple of practical jokes on him. That is, after all, what friends are for. Men look at this ritual as a kind of payback or punishment for leaving the pack to go out on his own with “a woman” who will now stand between them and their friend. The new wife is not deemed as the enemy, per say, but she is on the other side of a fence which they cannot cross. Gone are the days of all night rambles without repercussion.

There are many tricks and pranks that are standard procedure and are usually expected. The mystery of when is the only element of surprise left for these traditional pranks. The best man, however, is allowed one original prank before the invisible line is crossed. Only the best man or best friend of the groom is allowed this leeway and anyone else who attempts it — has crossed the line and will be severely chastised by the group. He becomes an outcast of sorts for an indefinite and unspecified period of time and the group knows only by instinct when that penalty period expires.

One of the traditional pranks is the greasing of the doorknobs of various dwellings owned or occupied by the husband to be. Large amounts of Vaseline are applied to the doorknob causing extreme difficulty in turning the knob to enter or exit. Another such original prank is the fake wedding favors, which could now be deemed as unique wedding favors as they consist of a package or condoms, a deck of naked lady cards and various other small items of a sexual nature all tied up in a nice little gift bag and placed before the bride and bridesmaids seats along with a fake invoice with the company logo of the original wedding favor supplier. This causes the bride to think that all the guests received these items and the shipper made a terrible mistake.

Toilet paper is another favorite prank when the friends of the groom get together and TP their buddy’s yard. In the wedding tradition, which differs from the Halloween trick, vast amounts of toilet paper are used and a thorough job is complete, usually late at night while their friend is asleep. This wedding prank can be carried out up to one week after the nuptials. Usually the TP party occurs while the couple is off on honeymoon.

The coup de resistance, as it were, is the best man’s prank, which can be quite original. My personal favorite the cricket joke, as it is both funny and embarrassing for the happy couple. It is vital to know what vehicle they will be using providing they will use one at all to go on the honeymoon. During the wedding or ensuing reception, thousands of live crickets are placed in the vehicle. When the newlyweds get in the vehicle and drive off, they do so to the tune of crickets noisily protesting their new home. It is hilarious to see them pull up to a red light next to other cars or even better, a police car, with crickets chirping so loudly that they have to blast the stereo or endure the laughing stares of strangers.

When your friend gets married, take your time and come up with something really original and unique. He may act upset at the time, but as soon as you are together without the new wife, he will appreciate you for it.

It is perfectly natural to be nervous on the day of your wedding. It does not matter if you are the bride or the groom, wedding day jitters comes with the territory. Just because something is natural, does not mean that you can’t do something about it. You can minimize your wedding day nerves by taking a few common sense steps the day before and the day of the blessed event. Each of these steps works to a certain extent but when it comes right down to it, nothing works better than being aware of how you are feeling and controlling it. A little mind over matter will power will do wonders for your state of mind.

Do not drink coffee on the morning of the event. If you are a coffee drinker and are one of those people who just cannot function until you have had a pot of coffee, try to keep it to a minimum. One or two cups should get you over the hump. Caffeine works by forcing the body to produce adrenalin, which will definitely make you a nervous Nellie. Just two cups of coffee, or roughly 180 mg, will triple the amount of adrenalin that is racing through your wedding day bloodstream. This forces sugar into your muscles at an accelerated rate and actually helps deplete the regular supply of sugar you will need to get through the day. Coffee has a half life of four hours in a healthy adult, which means that after four hours, your adrenalin level is still at least one and a half times what it should be. If you must drink coffee, drink just a little.

Don’t drink more than a small to moderate amount of alcohol the night before, or the morning of, your wedding. Alcohol turns into sugar so unless you plan on having constricted blood vessels and dehydration, the combination of which gives you a hangover, it is probably best if you stopped at one or two drinks at your ill advised — last night of freedom party — the night before. Alcohol also effects memory so try not to stress trying to figure out if you have forgotten anything, especially something minor like the spring wedding favors or the caterer’s check. You can handle problems just as well when they arise without worrying about something that has not happened yet.

Most people forget to do the one thing in an intense situation that will help them stay calm and keep a clear head, breathe. If you find yourself getting overly nervous, and let’s face it, you are bound to be a little nervous, remember to take deep breaths and focus, if only for a few seconds, on being calm. In through the nose and out through the mouth like a runner. Several deep-breathing, soul cleansing breaths and a little voice telling you to calm down will work wonders. The more of these cleansing breath exercises you do, the better it works.

Eat breakfast, especially if you must have coffee or you decided to let it all hang out the night before. Your body will function better if it has energy to draw upon and nutrients supplying your brain with what you will need to get through the day. If you are a nervous wreck, but a quick peek at your spouse to be reveals they are calm, cool, and totally collected, guess what. They took it easy the night before, had a bite to eat this morning, and kept the coffee to a minimum while you did not.

Own the fact that you are going to have some butterflies. It is perfectly natural to feel a little uptight when you are about to get married. Focus on those little garden wedding favors or something else that will take your mind off the big moment and you will be fine.

Wedding anniversaries are nice to celebrate. Some years are more momentous than others – but I think that we can all agree that a 70th wedding anniversary is quite the anniversary celebration. If you are privileged enough to know a couple about to commemorate this anniversary you will know that it can be hard to figure out what kind of gift to get them.

Due to the special nature of a 70th wedding anniversary, it would be fitting to create a gift that encompasses all the past 70 years of memories. Get the help of all the family members, children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, cousins etc. to bring together memories, stories photographs, drawings and newspaper headlines. Turn all these memories into a “This Is Your Life” type of memory book. Also put together a DVD with special messages from friends and family speaking about the anniversary couple and to them.

A great 70th wedding anniversary gift for a couple is a photo or story quilt designed and sewn by a family member. The quilt could represent the highlights of the couples achievements and memories. Have a few favorite photos or appliqued symbols to represent them. Using pieces of favorite old and outgrown items of clothing that contain special memories will add a nice personal touch.

A special gift for a special couple. Try to find one of these: Pictures now that from a certain angle change to another picture. It would be neat to have the couples original wedding picture and then what they look like today. What a keepsake! Your gift should be memorable item, something that shows how uncommon a 70 year anniversary is.

Keeping in mind that the recipient of a 70th wedding anniversary gift would probably be at least 90 years old, the book ‘Diamonds in the Dust’ would be a thoughtful gift. The book, by Joni Eareckson Tada is a book of daily devotions. Diamonds are a symbol of the 70th anniversary so the title of the book ties into that tradition.

These ideas for 70th wedding anniversary gifts are only the beginning. Try to think of some yourself to trying pay tribute to the couple celebrating 70 years of marriage.